privacy. (:

confused.

2010-07-08T10:48:00.001+08:00

should i continue working or just go back to studying?
i'm so fickle minded right now.
have to make up my mind soon. (:

piece of shit.

2010-06-23T23:23:00.005+08:00

thanks for manipulating my trust in you.
whatever bad things that's going to happen to you in the future, you really DESERVE it.
i just want you to bear in mind that KARMA'S A BITCH.

so please, stop acting stupid.
you know who you are.

enough said.

perth. (:

2010-06-21T12:10:00.002+08:00

let's just say that i'm back from my great trip to perth.
really enjoyed it damn much.
but sadly, i ended so fast.

hopefully, next two years, i'll be going there again. (:

xoxo.

reddd.. (:

2010-05-27T23:03:00.002+08:00

& yes.
red hair, you're finally mine! (:

question.

2010-05-06T22:47:00.002+08:00

so tell me,
how can u prove to that someone that you love so much that they're very special to you?

such a good question to ask, huh?
but don't you think that it's such a very tough question to answer?

sadly,
even for myself, i just don't know how to explain it.

ward 42.. ♥

2010-04-30T22:48:00.003+08:00

one word to describe my first day of work..
G R E A T !

amoxicillinnn. (:

2010-04-26T19:34:00.002+08:00

A is for Amoxicillin! (:

unfortunately, i've not been feeling very well lately.
went to the doctor today & all i got was lozenges & anti-biotics.
the doctor said i was having sorethroat.
i was having this feeling that i wasn't having sorethroat.
it's just something worse than that i guess. lols.

baby said i'll be fine after taking those medications.
aww, how sweet of him. (:

anyways, he's on afternoon shift today.
& few minutes ago, he called me up.
he wished me good night & asked me to rest coz i've taken my medication already.
aww, such a caring boyfriend. (:

so i guess i'm off now.
nights readers. (:

xoxo.

another week.

2010-04-18T22:06:00.002+08:00

oh well, i'm on morning shift tomorrow.
while baby is on afternoon shift. sad.
i just hope that he'll be sending me to work tomorrow.

i must admt that i really had so much fun with love for the whole week.
another one more week ok love? (:

i love you so much, baby!
mwah! (:

xoxo.

first day of orientation. (:

2010-04-05T22:32:00.002+08:00

first day of work. (:
hmm, not exactly work luh.

started off with orientation.
everything went very smoothly.
luckily it ended earlier than expected.

i really had so much fun with all of them.
about 150 people were present for the orientation.

tomorrow will be another day. (:
another G R E A T day aites, people.
* mwah *

xoxo.

those 15 things. ♥

2010-04-04T18:02:00.001+08:00

two thumbs up! (:

it's just worth it.

2010-04-03T13:15:00.008+08:00

we have a relationship worth fighting for & i'm not going to let this go.
eventhough we've fought, maybe even more than we've laughed lately, i can't just give up on this.
i can't pretend like you never made a difference in my life.
i'll fight for this if you will.

merry-go-round. ♥

2010-04-03T02:25:00.003+08:00

let's have fun going round & round on the merry-go-round ride, shall we baby?
* hugs *

xoxo.

around the world with you. (:

2010-04-02T13:16:00.002+08:00

& yes, please take me with you baby.
let's go travelling around the world & take lots of pictures together.
& enjoy every single moment together too.
we shall do it one day ok, baby?
promise? (:

xoxo.

PMS? or maybe it's just me.

2010-03-30T22:52:00.003+08:00

yes i totally do, baby. (:

i wonder what's with me this few days.
i just feel that i'm just not being myself.

i'm really sorry baby.
i just hope you understand.

no matter what happens,
i still love you, baby.
mwah! (:

xoxo.

that boy. (:

2010-03-30T02:07:00.006+08:00

I want a boy who will tell me when I’m being stupid. Who won’t baby me with his words.
A boy who will still give time to his friends. A boy who will tell me ‘No’.
He will watch stupid movies with me, but makes me watch his favorites also.
A boy who’s willing to drop everything to be with me, but knows when to let it be.
A boy who will know he’s important to me, but won’t mind when I change my plans to help someone out.
I want a boy who’s enjoyable to look at, he doesn’t have to be gorgeous.
I just want someone who I can pay attention to.
A boy who will randomly bring me food, cause he knows I love to eat.
A boy who can make jokes about me, a boy that I can laugh with.
Someone who wont mind when I even embarrass myself.
A boy who will buy me something, something I would actually want, none of that jewelry crap.
Someone who doesn’t do everything I ask but when it comes to something important I can count on him to be there.
Someone who I don’t feel threatened by.
A boy who has other friends that are girls, but I can trust him with them.
A boy who will know when to leave me alone when II have my stupid fits.
A boy who I can just sit with.
I don’t need the whole fairytale deal; I just want to feel comfortable.

free hugs? lols. (:

2010-03-29T16:23:00.003+08:00

hugs, hugs, hugs & more hugs. (:
i'm wishing for a hug from him in this rainy weather.

initially, i was feeling very cold.
since i'm under my comfy blanket, i'm feeling warm & sleepy.
oh yes, my eyes are seriously getting sleepier each second.

oh well, i'm just waiting for baby come home.
he said he's going on a shopping spree.

tak ajak aku. H M P H !

i wonder what he's buying for me.
he said it's a suprise.
such a cute boy.
lols. (:

hearts you lots baby.
* hugs *

oh damnnn..

xoxo.

buttterfly in hands. (:

2010-03-29T00:28:00.002+08:00

sometimes i wish i could fly away so free like a butterfly.
& maybe i wish that i could be problem free.

sometimes i wonder about my past.
is it a good thing or is it a bad thing?
i mean, without a past, i wouldn't be who i am now.

anyway, life has to move on.
i'm really thankful with what i have now.
only god knows how happy i am. (:

to the people in my past,
thanks & sorry for everything said & done.
by the way,
good luck in everything you do.

oh well,
just forget about the past.
i'm in the present now.
so.. kite enjoy! (:

xoxo.

those sleepless nights.

2010-03-28T01:19:00.004+08:00

yes, i wish it really happens.
anyway, i guess it's just not going to happen coz you're going to be away for a day.
ya luh, leave me for johor summore.
H M P H !

& i can't seem to sleep.
wishing you would call me up & tell me a bedtime story.
who am i kidding man, i'm no more a small kid.
lols. (:

oh well,
i'll just lie down on this comfy bed of mine.
& i'll try my best to fall asleep ok.
teehee. (:

please,
let me dream about T.O.P ok?
* insert cheeky smile *

xoxo.

T.O.P! ♥

2010-03-27T12:47:00.002+08:00

Choi Seung Hyun a.k.a T.O.P. ♥

the guy with the damn freaking cute smile.
& he has a great sense of humour.

xoxo.

sentosaaaaa! (:

2010-03-26T16:19:00.002+08:00

oh yes, i did smile the whole of yesterday. (:
had so much fun with those G E R E K people at sentosa.

we should go out again someday.
can't wait to be out again with you guys. (:

xoxo.

twins?

2010-03-24T22:14:00.002+08:00

oh my, this two pretty ladies are so beautiful. (:

isn't it fun to have a twin?
or maybe not.

oh wells,
back to the drawing board.
lols. (:

xoxo.

dear blog..

2010-03-24T02:27:00.003+08:00

dear self,
please stay strong.
everything is going to be fine.
take care.

lately, i've been feeling kinda low.
eventhough tears are rolling down my cheeks most of the time,
i'm really trying to tell myself to be strong.

dear boyfriend,
i need you here by my side.
let's go through this together ok.
i love you so much. (:

xoxo.

hiking. (:

2010-03-23T14:37:00.002+08:00

yesterday's activities :
mcdonald's breakfast, henderson waves & hortpark. (:

i had so much fun with love.
thanks for spending the whole of yesterday with me.
* hugs *

xoxo.

smileee.. (:

2010-03-21T20:19:00.003+08:00

yes, i love it when you do that thing you do. (:
* hugs *

i'm missing you damn lots baby.
i wonder when are we going to meet up again.
perhaps tomorrow? lols. (:

xoxo.

say hello to singapore. (:

2010-03-20T20:06:00.002+08:00

oh yes, i'm back in singapore!
had lots of fun there.
& i manage to do my shopping there too.
tasted great food, bought nice clothes & bags too. (:

ok, next destination during the june holidays..
P E R T H , here we come. (:

xoxo.

KL, here i come. ♥

2010-03-17T01:48:00.006+08:00

say H E L L O to K L ! (:
another few more hours i'm going to be there.
going to enjoy as much as i can.
will be back on the friday people.
take care aites. ♥

xoxo.

ben & jerry's. (:

2010-03-15T16:33:00.002+08:00

i wish i had one of those now.
especially that cookie dough ice cream!
yummy. (:

play, pause, rewind. (:

2010-03-14T10:56:00.002+08:00

have you ever wondered about this?
if you think properly, it'll be really cool if we can do all of this.
seriously, if it really happened, we'll be perfect humans.
oh well, let's just come back to reality. (:
& all of this is so not going to happen.

xoxo.

sweet hugs. (:

2010-03-13T14:31:00.003+08:00

trust me,
i would love to get one of this special hugs. (:
you should try to have one these days.
enjoy it fully coz you'll never know that you won't get it the next time round.

xoxo.

(:

2010-02-20T01:05:00.002+08:00

hey readers. (:
sorry for not updating this blog of mine for almost a week already.
hehe.

oh well,
nothing much happened this few days.
i'm just enjoying every moment now.
i mean, before i actually have a real job.

let's enjoy, enjoy, enjoy! (:

a trip to the library. ♥

2010-02-09T23:54:00.004+08:00

today, i had so much fun with love.
went on a trip to the library to read up on some books.
& yes, it was all about photography. haha!

we did some readings on travelling too.
planning to go australia for further studies.
few years down the road maybe.
who knows, god knows. (:

after all those readings & laughters that we had at the library,
we decided to return home.

& yes, not forgetting,
keropok lekor from woodlands bazaar & curry puffs from old chang kee. (:
& also bottles of mineral water.
hmm, sedap nyeee.. haha!

to baby love,
get well soon aites.
gonna miss you lots.

& i ♥ you so much baby.
*hugs*

it's all about you. ♥

2010-02-07T11:30:00.003+08:00

guess what baby?
i watched a cute video of you & some of your classmates on facebook.
it made me laugh & smiled so widely.
especially when it comes to you & your cute antics. (:

& yes, i heart you lots. ♥

xoxo.

seventh. ♥

2010-02-07T01:04:00.005+08:00

happy 1st monthsary love. (:

to baby love,
thanks for everything said & done.
really appreciate it lots.
i'll pray very hard that we'll last long ok. (:
i love you so very the muchy! ♥

by the way,
we'll meet up soon alright baby.
VERY SOON.
i really miss you damn much tau.

xoxo.

feeling-feeling bersama lagu-lagu korean. ♥

2010-02-04T17:28:00.002+08:00

oh my gosh, i really can't believe this.
i've been spending my whole day listening to korean songs. (:
how great is that?

oh well, i'm just listening to some songs from
2PM, 2AM, Super Junior, Brown Eyed Girls, Big Bang, etc..
not bad tau. (:

well, i must say that korean songs are very the gerek man.
i like! (:

& yes, i'm still browsing through some korean songs on youtube.
downloading them & also listening to it over & over again. (:
but then, only catchy korean songs attracts me.

to those of you out there,
if you have nice korea songs to listen to, do recomend them to me please.
thank you very much. (:

to baby love,
please recomend me nice & catchy korean songs.
sorry for the trouble baby. haha!

& by the way, i miss you damn lots ok.
can't wait to meet up with you tomorrow.
i ♥ you so very the muchy! (:

xoxo.

graduation day! ♥

2010-02-02T23:24:00.010+08:00

2nd february 2010 : Graduation Day! ♥

i seriously couldn't believe that i've actually graduated from this nursing course.
oh well, off to real world now.
welcome to the working world, riyana. (:

& believe me, it feels like yesterday i just started my course.
2 years has past. it passes very fast though.
i would like to say thanks to all my friends & teachers for the good memories we had together.
i really appreciate it lots.
& i hope that our friendship doesn't end here aites.
hehe. (:

to all my friends,
i'm gonna miss you all so much.
hope that we'll meet up one day ok.
& all the best in whatever you do.
be a good nurse ok. (:

& to my baby love,
thanks for lending me the camera.
so now i can become a photographer like you too.
then we can compare all our pictures taken together.
see whose picture is much nicer. hehe. (:
& thanks for everything that happened today baby.
you know, i know ok. (:
i love you so much. ♥

& yes,
5 more days!

103th. ♥

2010-02-01T17:01:00.008+08:00

1 more day to graduation! (:

& not forgetting,
6 more days to the big day! ♥
i love you baby.

102th. ♥

2010-01-27T17:18:00.005+08:00

when boredom strikes, i'll start blogging. (:

oh well, i'm back people.
i've been feeling super duper bored during the weekdays.
current status : everyday, i'm not having any plans & also, really running low on cash.
sheeshh..

& i'm sure that you guys did come across my previous post.
the one about me selling muffins & cookies. (:
sadly to say, it's being put on hold for the moment.
due to some technical & other difficulties.
sorry people.

not forgetting, about me & that photographer.
we're still going strong & as happy as ever.
easier said, everyday we'll never fail to laugh our lungs out. (:
& yes, i do love him alot. ♥

tomorrow's another day. (:
luckily, i already have plans to go out.
gotta find that particular pants that i've been aiming for.
& it's gonna be worn during graduation.
can't wait for it.

6 more days to graduation. (:

xoxo.

muffins & cookies for sale. ♥

2010-01-22T01:00:00.005+08:00

to all those muffin & cookie lovers out there, i have a special treat for you.
i am selling some home made muffins & also cookies made by the awesome me!
wanna know more? tag me aites. (:

xoxo. ♥

100th. ♥

2010-01-21T14:04:00.005+08:00

let me summarize everything that happened yesterday.
well, i had a great time.
great sangat-sangat. ♥
& i really enjoyed it too.

next in line :
singapore botanical gardens. ♥
saturday baby. (:
teehee.

xoxo.

99th. (:

2010-01-19T15:24:00.004+08:00

meeting up with each other : twice. (:
this is what i call, super duper fun.

another meet up of ours is on saturday.
this time round, we're going to singapore botanical gardens. ♥
& maybe, we're going for another round of shopping together.
can't wait. (:

by the way,
i have a shopping date with my dearest girlfriends tomorrow. (:
i wonder where we're going this time round.
hmmm.. (:

oh yes,
i've decided to apply my real job at NUH.
& not forgetting, at TTSH too instead of SGH.
hmm, i wonder what's with the sudden change of decision?
hah, god knows. (:

& now, let me tell you what im gonna do today.
i'm going to do this two important things :
do my laundry & clean up my damn messy bedroom.
that's all.
& once i'm done with this two important things,i can do whatever i want. (:

guess what?
i'm still working on it. heh. (:

xoxo. ♥

♥ (:

2010-01-17T23:23:00.002+08:00

i got one word to describe saturday's date,
fantastic. ♥

dateee. (:

2010-01-15T18:30:00.003+08:00

today's super duper good news :
my pay is in. (:

but then, i've yet to check it out.
it's ok, i shall do it tomorrow.

& yes, before i forget,
tomorrow is the day!
my saturday date. (:

xoxo.

a dose of morphine please.. (:

2010-01-14T15:55:00.007+08:00

photography + nursing = love (:

he's like a hard candy with a suprise center.
further more, he enjoys photography & he's in nursing line too.
in additional, he likes to make others laugh with his hilarious antics.
gosh, how great can that be?
let's hope & pray that he's the one for me. (:
i feel that there's lots of similarities between me & him.
it's just weird but i kinda like it.

& yes, i love having those conversations with him during the night.
he never fails to make me laugh till my cheeks hurts.
the funny part is, we can just randomly choose a topic & turn it into one damn ridiculous joke.
it's stupid yet hilarious.
at the end of the day, we enjoyed our time spent together. (:

oh yeah, saturday's date is still on!
i wonder what are we going to do on that day.
i guess most of the time we'll just laugh our ass off.
he's quite a joker, you know.
oh well, i can't wait for saturday! (:

xoxo.

lovey dovey. (:

2010-01-13T14:29:00.007+08:00

current status : deeply in love.

i know this is totally crazy but i kinda love the feeling anyway. haha. i mean, it's really weird that i can get over someone that fast. i felt that it was totally impossible to do it, like seriously. but it's ok.

so yeah. maybe i'm having a date with that particular guy this saturday.
please take note of the word, maybe.

& yes, please consider myself lucky, coz i'm in love with a nurse too. (:

xoxo. ♥

singlehood. (:

2010-01-12T15:32:00.005+08:00

you & me = game over.
next please.. (:

& yes, i had enough with your nonsensicle behaviour. you & your too controlling attitude. & not forgetting, your i-want-to-show-the-whole-world-that-i-love-her-so-much attitude. seriously, who the hell you think you are man? get a hold of yourself uh. i ain't your wife man. urgh!

by the way,
hugging & kissing in public is a BIG NO NO for me, man.
get that inside your tiny head man, like seriously.

on the brightside,
i guess i'm having someone in mind for the moment. & i'm taking things slowly. (:
at the moment, we're just in the process of getting know each other well.
overall, he's a nice guy. & he never fails to make me laugh each day.
thank you so much dear. (:

as for me,
i'm enjoying every single bit of my singlehood now.
i feel so damn free. free to do whatever i want baby. (:
let's make it one year can? or maybe two?
haha. who knows. only god knows. (:

xoxo.

should i or shouldn't i?

2010-01-07T01:49:00.006+08:00

you got me thinking, was it a mistake that i made for leaving you? there's alot of things i wanna say to you, but all the words are just not coming out from my mouth. it's rather strange but i'm just unable to do anything about it. i feel like meeting up with you this week but i guess you wouldn't want to anyway. so, i guess i'll just forget about it then. i'm really sorry for whatever happened between you & me. i just want you to know that it's not your fault. i just need time for myself. that's all.

& as for YOU, you don't have to tell the whole world that i'm like one desperate bitch who wants you back so badly. if you don't want to accept me back, that's your damn bloody problem. i just hope that you'll realise it one day that you're missing out on something so real. those memories that we shared in the past, i guess it doesn't mean anything to you right? honestly, i did forgive & forget about those things that you did in the past. to me, you're just a slefish guy who only thinks about yourself. i mean, everyone in this world isn't perfect. including you. & everyone deserves another chance in life. how would you feel if you're in my shoes & i did the same thing to you? wouldn't it be hurtful? think about it please. you're not a kid anymore, you know. danggg.

now, as for me, i wanna have my own time & find what i really want in life. i'll just have to settle myself first before going into another relationship. i don't wish to make the same mistakes again. i wish to be a much better person & also to be a positive one too. best of luck. (:

xoxo, riyana.

end.

2010-01-06T23:15:00.002+08:00

i'm sorry for ending it this way.
it's all my fault, it ain't yours.

if you ever need me, you know where to find me.
xoxo.

moodless.

2010-01-05T19:05:00.004+08:00

i'm just not myself lately.
i've been having bad moodswings.
& at times, i'll just breakdown & cry.

relationship wise,
i've given up on love for the moment.
even my feelings for my current one have fadded away.
everything happens so suddenly.

it's just me, not anyone else.
i really need space for myself at the moment.
until i find my inner self back, then maybe everything will resume as per normal.

note :
please tell me not to be in a relationship with anyone else except for that Mr A.
thanks.

pissed.

2010-01-04T14:12:00.007+08:00

omg. can you like stop being so freaking irritating? you're really starting to get on my nerves.
today, you really made me so damn freaking pissed. i mean, you know that i slept late last night & you just have to give me a wake up call at around noon? can't you like wait for me to text you, telling you that i'm awake already? i'm not a kid anymore, mind you. i don't have to be told what to do, you know. damn. & now i'm still sleepy & i couldn't get back to sleep.
how great is that?

thanks eh boyfriend.

figure it out.

2010-01-03T01:24:00.008+08:00

current status : confused.

you got me thinking,
are you really gonna make that move
to actually come back into my life
coz that's where you truly belong?

year 2009. (:

2009-12-31T21:05:00.022+08:00

year 2009.

it's just not the same as any other year throughout my 18 years of living.
it holds alot of bittersweet memories, especially for me.

to my most beloved class, JR0801E. ♥

congratualations to all of us for completing our 2 years in this nursing course together.
you guys have been a very great class & i'll never forget all the moments spent together.
good luck to all of you alright. be good nurses people.
miss you all damn much. (:

to my dearest NUH group 1. ♥

the last attachment was a blast. we enjoyed ourself & also worked hard to finish our skills.
from 1.1 till 2.2, we worked together as a team. i really enjoy being with all of you.
good luck in whatever you do aites. miss you all too. (:

to bestfriends, estee & natasha. ♥

it has been ard 6 years we've been friends. since secondary school days till now.
we had lots of fun together. laugh out loud like nobody's business.
& i'll always be the one who will be cracking up stupid jokes till both of you laugh till both your stomachs n cheeks felt the cramp. haha!
& i know i've not been spending time with the both of you. i'm so sorry girls, i'm just too caught up with some stuff. we'll go out soon ok? love & miss you girls. (:

to bestfriends, amirah, shariffah, hazmi, sahida & atiqah. ♥

hey girls & guy, thanks for being there for me all this while. really appreciate it most.
let's hope that our friendship last till we die can? haha!
oh well, lets go out together like after we get our salary ok? haha.
love & miss you all. (:

to my super cute bestfriend, sufiana safiena. ♥

suprised to have your picture here? haha. at least its cute babe. (:
well, your picture is her coz i want to say thanks for everything said & done.
all the fun times we share together. we even cried together.
so yeah, i hearts you lots baby.
by the way, let's forget about those 22's. sickening assholes. hahhahaha!
good luck in whatever you do ok. see you soon baby. (:

to my bestfriend, rais rahman. ♥

this guy here has been searching for me eversince both of us left primary school. at last, he actually found me on facebook. you don't know how happy he is when he found me. haha!
hey buddy, thanks for everything said & done. much appreciated.
& i just love that tissue paper out from the webcam trick of yours. damn hilarious i tell you.
i know you have lots of our webcam pictres. especially those ridiculous ones.
please keep it for our own references ONLY. haha!

let's hope that our friendship will last long.
i don't want to lose you once more man. like seriously. (:

i'm still looking forward for our meet up.
i want my McSpicy pleaseeeeeeee... haha! (:

to my beloved cousin, khairulanwar. ♥

you're the best thing that has ever happend to me.
you're just like my brother, who is always there for his sister, through thick or thin.
we've been through alot those past few years.
oh well, let's hope that we have a great 2010 ok?
i love you so much brother. (:

to my bestest & unforgettable ex-boyfriend, asyraf. ♥

hey sepet, i guess you're not suprised to be here right? haha.
by the way,i just want to say thanks for everything said & done in the past
you taught me alot of things & made me who i am today.
i wish you all the best in life. & congrates for entering ITE.
ITE simei eh? haha.
hope to see you around. (:

P.S : my love for you didn't change a single bit. (:

to my boyfriend, azahar. ♥

hey baby, all i hope for is that we'll last long ok.
we'll try to make it through together ok.
study hard & excel ok. i know you can do it.
you're in year 2 next year, show what you got ok.
good results is what i want from you. (:
love you so much. (:

as for me,
my new year's resolution is to be a good nurse. (:
after i get my certificate in nursing on february, i'll be starting work from that month onwards.
all the best to me.

& another resolution of mine,
to get him back, i guess.
*evil laughs*

have a great 2010 everyone. (:

xoxo, nur riyana.♥

a song dedication for you. (:

2009-12-28T22:36:00.001+08:00

& you know who you are. (:

without you.

2009-12-25T21:20:00.005+08:00

memories of you & me = treasured. ♥

i'm still wondering about my love life. it's really confusing. one moment i really want this current relationship to last, but another moment i want it to end as soon as possible. what's wrong with me? but one thing i know is that i'm not over asyraf. i wouldn't care to whoever wants to call me stupid for not getting over him after what he did to me all this while. for your information, asyraf is the best thing that has ever happen to me. because of him, i've changed. i owe him alot. he's always been there for me even i wasn't there for him most of the time. tell me, how can you get that kind of guy? it ain't easy. he's one hunk who can be any girls dream guy. gosh, he's like my jacob black from the movie, new moon. haha.

in other words, i'm still holding on tightly to my current one. i mean, azahar is a great guy and he has a great personality too. but i just feel that maybe he's just not the one for me. i feel that he deserves someone better than me. dunno luh eh..

thinking about it, i clearly remembered that i promised myself that asyraf will be the last person whom i'm going to love thoughout my whole life. is it because of this, that's why i'm finding it so hard to move on now? i just have a feeling that it's a yes. it's because of this, i'm still hoping for you to come back into my life again. till at this very moment, i'm still waiting for your return.

" have you ever been in a position whereby you're forcing yourself to move on with life with the next one when you're heart is actually stuck to the previous one? think about it... "

you got me crying tonight, is this what its gonna be like?
i try and act like im fine but i will never be right.

he'll ask the sun to shine away from me today so i can cry.

2009-12-16T02:49:00.017+08:00

like what he says;

" your tears won't bring him back.
i know you wish that it did but it just don't work like that.
i know that healing takes time, even your heart has a pace.
but how much time are you gonna take? too much would be a mistake. "

isn't it sweet to know that your boyfriend actually stays up just to text you & entertain your nonsense just because you tell him that you're unable to sleep from the moment you put down the phone after having a nice conversation with him like few hours ago?
haha! damn cute i tell you. & yes, that's exactly what my boyfriend did for me.

anyways, thank you for staying up with me, boyfriend.
& i'm sorry that you had to sacrifice your sleep for me.
aww.. that's very sweet of you. hehe.
*insert cheeky smile*

i love you boyfriend. (:

nursing life. (:

2009-12-14T13:41:00.005+08:00

hey beautiful strangers,
i'm back! (:

well, i'm done with my attachment already. so now i've like graduated already, just waiting to get my certificate in febuary 2010. now i've got to go for job hunting. right now i only need to fill up the application form & send it to the headquaters. basically, i'll be applying my real job at NUH. but then, i'm still thinking about applying at SGH too. see how luh eh.

ok, enough of those stuff. now my aim is to really enjoy my holidays to the max. i want to relax my mind before i have to really use it for the real job. gosh, i feel so young to even have a stable job. sad or what. but it's ok. i still have a long way to go. can slowly upgrade myself.

next in line, diploma in nursing please. (:
time frame : 5 years?

oh well, let's see how it goes ok. these are just plannings & i have to work hard to achieve my goal. no more fooling around eh. must really go all out already. like what some of my friends say, " no more student nurse already uh. " haha! damn funny.

anyways, i really enjoy being in this course. a big thank you to all my friends for the support & the fun that we had. good luck to all of you ok. be a good nurse ok. (:

by the way,
plan for this week : class chalet this wednesday till friday. (:
going to enjoy myself to the max. party all the way ok people.

till here then.
toodles.. (:

letting go..

2009-12-07T23:43:00.002+08:00

good luck to your next one. (:
i hope she makes you much more happier than i did.
take care.

dedication.

2009-12-07T19:46:00.003+08:00

to my dearest asyraf,

i'm really shocked that you actually know my new blog link. i thought you wouldn't care anymore. anyway, the reason why you're saying all those is simply because you already found someone new. i'm right, don't i? you just don't know how i really feel deep down inside. how much i suffered just to get you out of my mind. anyways, you don't have to worry coz i told my boyfriend that i'm still not over you. he's ok with it. he just says that i need time to get over it. & how could i possibly forget about you that easily? we've been through alot of things together for the past years. gosh, don't you get that? maybe it's meaningless to you, but to me, it's not. all the memories that we shared, it's just too precious. i treasured it alot & thank you for those memories. (:

as for now, i'm starting every single thing from scratch. i mean, at the end of the day, i have to pick myself up & move on with life. be it if i'm single or attached. anyway, it doesn't make a difference. to hell with it. by the way, i still feel that i'm single eventhough i'm attached. just not getting all the attention that i need. you know how i get my attention from you last time rite?

oh well, at times, i really miss your presence. i wish i could just have that one last day with you again. i know i'm like asking something so damn impossible but it's just those memories that are making me feel that you're here by my side again. everything i do or everywhere i go, there's just memories about you. even looking at our pictures on my camera makes me feel that i'm with you again. but the fact is that i'm not. & it's really disappointing knowing the fact is that we're not together anymore. & it's also sad to know that you're dating someone else already. as what they say, " when you're jealous, it means that you still love that person very much." to believe or not to believe? still, i choose to believe it.

anyway, good luck to your next one. (:
i'll just hope & pray that she makes you much more happier than i did.

past love.

2009-12-05T23:05:00.010+08:00

my dearest asyraf,

i hope you're reading this coz im just going to spill my hearts content. for this past 7 months, i just can't seem to get you out of my mind. even how hard i try. you must be thinking that i've moved on with life since i already have someone new. guess you're wrong. sadly, i haven't. & no matter how many times i tried to tell you how i feel, you would just give me the impression that you don't care. coz you claimed that you're over me already. & i remembered you saying that you wouldn't be so stupid to have me back coz i've replaced you with someone else. it hurts. alot. but what can i do? simply nothing. you've changed. & so do i. we're just like two individuals that are on our own paths already. i just hope that one day, we'll cross paths again. by the way, i'm just trying my best to move on with life without you now. i'm sure you're enjoying life rite now. good luck for everything you do ok.
actually i have so much to say but i guess till here is enough for now.

& before i go,
i just want to say that i miss everything about you.

speedy..

2009-11-26T01:17:00.002+08:00

hey there beautiful strangers.
i'm sorry for not updating my blog recently.
i'm just too caught up with my attachment currently.

nothing much really happen.
at this period of time, i'm just thinking where should i go next after graduation.
and at the same time, i'm thinking about other stuff too.
but it's ok. i'll get over it real soon.

oh well, i'll do a proper update soon when i'm done with these shits ok people. (:

hiatus.

2009-11-14T01:54:00.002+08:00

will be back pretty soon. (:

3 words.

2009-11-08T23:32:00.005+08:00

you may not have heard me tell you that i love you,
but the way that i look into your eyes,
the way i smile when you pass by,
& the way that my heart feels when you are near,
all speaks of what best describes the love that i feel.

i love you baby boy. (:

crazier.

2009-10-31T18:03:00.021+08:00

hey there beautiful strangers.

here's the updates for today...

weekends are the rest days for me as i have worked hard on the weekdays.
facing different kinds of patients each day.
oh well. that's working life i guess. (:

by the way,
i manage to meet up with syg yesterday.
went double dating with my bestfriend & her bf too.
hmm. so we went to west coast park & had a really great time.
thank you love. (:

hmm. so we shall do it again next time ok?
or should i say, next week? hahaha! (:
let's go shopping again ok?
this time round, you treat me aites?
muhahahahhah! (:

and yes.
today i slept more that 12 hours again.
so damn tired due to insufficient rest during the weekdays.
so i woke up near to 4 in the afternoon. lol. (:

by the way,
i'm waiting for baby boy to call or text me.
i guess he's still asleep after coming back from work in the afternoon.
hmm. such a hardworking guy. (:

i pity him though as he have to juggle both school & work.
must have enough rest ok baby boy?
and please, don't hurt yourself again during work.
i know you like it when i have to treat your wound everytime you hurt yourself.
but it's not free ok. haha!
anyway, i just want you to always be extra careful during work.
i'm damn worried about you ok.

and you owe me a first aid kit ok. (:
don't forget hor. hahaa!

more updates soon.
toodles. (:

words.

2009-10-25T22:37:00.006+08:00

hey there beautiful stangers.
here's the updates for today. (:

guess what?
today i meet up with him. (:
although it was just for a while, it really means alot to the both of us.
coz on weekdays, we're just too caught up with work, school & attachment.
the only thing we could do is just text or call each other for a while.

even at this very moment,
he's probably sleeping coz he's going to work at 4am.
then later he's going to school for his lessons.
such a hardworking guy.
* salutes * (:

maybe i'll be calling him in a while.
or maybe not. haha!
don't want to disturb his sleeping hours.
but oh well. i'll see how ok. haha! (:

and yes,
tomorrow i'm on afternoon shift.
sheeshhh.. but it's ok.
as long as i get to go to school for SIM training on tuesday.
hahaha! yippie!
* kening naik naik *
and yes, i better make extra sure that i'm not late for SIM training.
heh. (:

ok. till here then.
i'm off to play my sims 3.
then off to bed. hahah! (:
toodles..

" love is just a word till you really know what it means. "

saturday love. (:

2009-10-24T20:59:00.002+08:00

hey there beautiful strangers.
here's the updates for today.

you know what?
i'm sitting on the couch rite now, eating the roti telur that i made earlier on.
hahah! sedapppp.. (:

i'm waiting for him to text me.
he's out with his friends tonight. go lepak i guess.
and i'm at home alone coz everyone is out.

so i did my laundry.
( at last, i cleared it. yippie! )

and yes, i had more than enough sleep today.
i actually slept for about more than 12 hours.
hahah! best or what. (:

ok, i'm out of words.
toodles. (:

i love you so much, boy. (:

swings. (:

2009-10-23T22:53:00.004+08:00

hey there beautiful strangers.
sorry for the late entry.
was really busy with my attachment for the whole week.

gosh. i feel so restless after coming back from work today.
actually i just woke up, feeling kinda moody though.

anyway, i'm missing him so much.
luckily he texted me.
& now i'm on the phone with him.
hehe. (:

by the way, i had fun being attached to ward 5G.
next is ward 51. hopefully everything goes smoothly. (:

and yes, i'm going back to school next tuesday for SIM training.
yeah! i'm able to meet my * ehem ehem *
lol. (:

ok. i'm off now.
more updates tomorrow ok. (:

toodles..

miss you baby boy. (:

love. (:

2009-10-18T23:16:00.005+08:00

18 october 2009.
the date that i'll always remember from now onwards.
thank you so much love.
i love you.

xoxo, riyana. (:

busy..

2009-10-15T00:23:00.006+08:00

sorry beautiful strangers.
i will be very busy from this week onwards.
will be back soon.

love, riyana. (:

comfort, cotside, callbells. pfft.

2009-10-11T10:18:00.005+08:00

hey there beautiful strangers.
here are the updates for today.

first of all i would like to apologise for not updating for days.
been neglecting my blog recently.
& alot of things been happening in my life.
don't wish to blog about it uh. haha!

that reminds me.
tomorrow is the start of my attachment.
omg omg omg...
the sound of the call bells ringing in my head.
haha. oh well, hope that everything goes fine this time round.

today's plan. (:
going to religious class.
then after that, off to my uncle's house...

when i'm back home tonight,
gotta make sure that i sleep early.
so that i have enough rest for tomorrow. (:

toodles. (:

sick & tired.

2009-10-06T13:01:00.003+08:00

hey there beautiful strangers.
more updates yaw.. (:

first of all i would like to say is,
im so shocked to see what is written on my tagboard.
i didn't expect to see all of that.
please stop all those nonsense eh.
don't create a scene at my blog. it's really damn irritating.

stop it eh! i'm warning you.

secondly,
i had great fun these few days with friends. (:
shall do it again someday.
maybe during the december holidays.
yippie! * jumps around *

thirdly,
attachment starting next week.
but i'm too lazy to start work.
hahah! but its ok.
at least i get to meet my attachment friends that i miss. (:
i'll make sure that i'll go all out this time round.
& not forgetting to have lots of fun too. hahha!
make sure that i don't screw up too. heh. (:

lastly,
tomorrow i'm going jalan raye with JR0801E again. (:
still deciding what to wear. haha!
gonna start our visiting from the west side first.
then off to north / south / east side. haha! (:
looking forward to it.

that's it for the updates people.
toodles.

to you,
i'm really shocked to see what you wrote on my tagboard.
i just couldn't believe my eyes.
you better make sure you don't do that again.
i had enough of those craps.

wasted.

2009-10-04T18:37:00.004+08:00

gave you the chance but you blew it, boy.
& now i'm gone.

stronger.

2009-09-30T16:31:00.007+08:00

" my most beloved cousin, khairul. "

hello beautiful strangers. (:
here's the updates for today.

let's start off with yesterday.
went out jalan raye with my JR0801E. (:
not all of them came as they have something on.
really had fun with them. & we took lots of pictures too. (:

second round ok peeps? (:

yeah. there's going to be a second round next week.
if i'm not mistaken, it's on next wednesday.
can't wait. (:

anyway, someone sent me home again yesterday. heeee... (:

about today.
i'm not planning to go out.
maybe i'm just too tired. haha!
more updates soon.... (:

toodles.

to you,
i'm through with you.
& i really mean it.

red love. (:

2009-09-29T08:07:00.006+08:00

good morning beautiful strangers. (:
here's the updates for today.

let's start with yesterday. (:
decided to go shopping with natasha.
so we went to bugis. then to vivo city.
around 3 plus, khairul joined us.
bought some stuff. & i bought a pretty dress. (:
then natasha had to leave as she had a date with her * ehem ehem *

hahah. then me & khairul continued to walk around vivo city.
went to the adidas shop to buy slippers.
i liked one of the slippers. haha!
what do u expect? its pink & white. lol. (:
but the one that khairul like is in black.
then planned to buy it with him since he wants to buy one for himself too.
but sadly, there's no size for him. haha.
so i kill the idea of buying it. haha.

then i met mira as i need to pass her my polo-t shirt.
then we went to ben & jerry's to eat ice cream.
yippie! * jumps around * (:
then walked around vivo for a while.
then she had to go. so we parted.
so left me & khairul again. haha!

then off to city hall.
finally, he bought the slippers that he wanted from adidas. (:
but i didn't coz the one i like isn't there. haha.
after that, we went seperate ways.

hmm.. someone sent me home yesterday. heeeee.. (:

so today,
going jalan raye with the beloved JR0801E. (:
i miss all of you peeps.
anyways, we all have to reach at aljunied at 12pm.
must not be late also. haha.
must be ready in about 2 hours time. hahah!

toodles. (:

to you,
thanks for showing me your true colours.

paparazzi. (:

2009-09-26T09:25:00.003+08:00

hey there beautiful strangers. (:
i'm back for more updates.

about yesterday,
i really had fun going jalan raye with the girls. (:
& we had pictures taken too.

& i met mira too.
oh gosh, i miss her damn much.
we even hugged each other. lol. (:

anyway,
today i'm going jalan raye with my family.
& that includes khairul's family too.
yippie! * jumps around *
so yar. going out in 2 hours time i guess. (:

guess what?
i slept for 12 hours yesterday.
i was so tired. haha! (:
i hope it helps me to change back my body clock so that
i don't suffer from abnormal sleeping patterns.

oh well. that's it i guess.
before i go...

to you,
i was surprised that you read my blog.
hmm. amalkan selalu ok. haha! (:

& whatever i type here about you,
don't take it to heart ok.
i'm just typing out how i feel jer.

if you're not happy with me,
feel free to approach me alright? (:

sayang awak selalu.
( eventhough you don't feel the same way as i do lah. haha! )

toodles.

" i'm your biggest fan, i'll follow you until you love me.
papa-paparazzi."

the W word. (:

2009-09-25T08:17:00.005+08:00

greetings beautiful strangers. (:
here's your updates for today.

so i didn't go out with them yesterday.
everything was canceled coz everyone had their own plans.
so maybe we're going out next week.
hope so luh. haha! (:

anyways,
today im going out with my girlfriends.
go jalan raye jer. then maybe have lunch together. (:
i'm going to meet them in 2 hrs time. hahaha!

oh ya, guess what?
HE actually talked to me on MSN yesterday.
super surprising i tell you.
it's like an invisible lady who lost her superpowers. haha!
or is it because of my personal message on MSN that says,
" ignorance is your new bestfriend. "
oh gosh, i wonder.

oh well, there you go again.
when i've decided to move on with my life,
you will always be there to persuade me to stay.
ok, whatever. (:

" adakah perasaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta yang masih bersemadi untukmu?
dan sebenarnya ku mengharapkan di sebalik senyuman mu itu,
kau juga merindui aku. "

insomnia? (:

2009-09-24T08:16:00.005+08:00

hey there fellow readers. (:
sorry for not updating my blog for the past days.
it's either i'm busy going for visiting or just don't know what to write. haha.

well, it's raining outside & i'm not asleep.
sitting here in my room, wondering what to type in this post of mine.
i enjoy watching the raindrops falling from the sky.
it just makes me wonder what you're doing currently.

but now, it's just different.
looking at the raindrops, it makes me wonder how you truly feel deep inside.
was everything you said in the past just lies as you don't want to hurt my feelings.
or is it true but lately your feelings had faded away for me.
god knows.

anyways,
maybe today i'm going out with natasha & khairul.
go shopping & spent time together.
need to relax & chill.
& i also need to buy stuff on my shopping list. hehe. (:

oh well, we're not sure where we're going today though.
but whatever it is, i'm going to eat at ramen ten.
hahaha! i want to eat sushi. (:

now i don't know what to do.
i can't sleep. my sleeping time is in a big mess.
maybe i'm having insomnia. haha!

toodles. (:

" if you love that someone, set him free.
if he comes back to you, it means that he's meant for you.
but if he doesn't, it means that both of you are not fated to be together. "

ayat-ayat cinta...

2009-09-21T09:13:00.004+08:00

selamat hari raya aidilfitri.
maaf zahir dan batin. (:

so i'm done with my first day of raya.
i really enjoyed it. (:
i sangat suke dengan duit collection i. hehe..

ok. now i'm off to celebrate my second day of raya.
more updates soon ok? (:

to you :
now i know that you don't feel the same way as i do.
thanks for telling me the truth yesterday.

honestly, i'm just sad & disappointed with myself.
no matter how much tears i shed, it won't change anything.

i'm sorry but i have to make a decision.
it's either i stay & hurt myself again
or just walk away from your life & never come back.

enough said.

* blowing bubbles *

2009-09-17T03:18:00.010+08:00

3 more days to hari raya & still no sight of excitement in me.
that's sad you know.

oh well, i'm having so many things in my mind now.
plan to do alot of things after raya. (:

so, paintball anyone? (:

oh yeah, i had a dream about HIM yesterday.
it's sweet but to me, it's a beautiful nightmare.
please, i don't wish to elaborate further or either dream about it again.
( padahal dalam hati, nak lagi jer mimpi pasal nie. haha! )
ok. merepek.
seriously, i dont want.
the dream made me have interrupted sleep tau tak!
irritating specimen. pfft..

anyways, i'm not satisfied with my blogskin.
i still think that i can improve on it way better.
new blog skin on the way.
( better pray hard that i'll find one that satisfy me. )

so i guess i won't be updating this few days till raye maybe.
will be busy cleaning my room. (:
& doing house chores.
& also helping granny & mummy with cooking.
* jumps around *

that's it i guess. but before i go...

to you,
hope you da prepare untuk raye eh.
i know you dont have the mood to raye coz of your N's.
i pun not really in the mood ok. hmph..
but at least enjoy raye as much as we can ok? (:
sayang awak selalu..

everywhere i go..

2009-09-12T20:55:00.000+08:00

cause everywhere i go, no matter what i do boy,
i just can't get you out of my head.

i tell myself to get over you as it was the right thing to do.
and just when thought i was done, you pull me in for another run.

C is for CUPCAKES! (:

2009-09-10T20:11:00.001+08:00

cute, cute cupcakes. (:

tomorrow i'm making cookies again.
the second batch. (:
*jumps around*

ok. i did screw up the first batch.
but it was due to some technical difficulties.
oh well, i'm not going to screw up the second batch.

and if there's enough time tomorrow,
maybe i'll bake muffins too. (:

to love,
thanks for the messages sent yesterday night.
i'm still in love with you boy. (:

C is for cookies. (:

2009-09-09T01:31:00.002+08:00

yippie! i'm done with my examinations. (:
now off to prepare for hari raya celebration.

hmm..
i'm going to bake my signature cookies tomorrow.
* jumps around *
sape nak, sila ke rumah saya ye.
tapi kalau anda hendak mencubanya, sila datang selepas buka ehh..
hehe. (:

anyway, i'm off to bed now.
besok nak kene bangun awal untuk sahur eh.
hugs & kisses. (:

study mode. (:

2009-09-01T00:10:00.005+08:00

" my heart burst into fire. "

oh well, exams are around the corner.

study yana, study! (:

to love,

good luck for your N-levels, ok.

i love you. (:

letting go.

2009-08-30T00:43:00.004+08:00

" having a positive thinking about you. yes, it's definitely about you. "

i'm still feeling the same way as i did yesterday.

seriously, nothing changed.

but it's weird that at a point of time, i just feel like breaking down & cry.

to diyy,

thanks for all the advices given on my taggy today.

really need it & much appreciated.

thanks for being there for me.

you stay strong too ok love. (:

to fiena,

thanks for all the positive things you told me.

i'll bear that in mind always & hopefully it works on me.

& thanks for the stupid piggy BFF thingy.

she's still your BFF. ahahahaah! (:

* rolling on the floor, laughing my ass off. *

to love,

thanks for everything said & done.

we'll cross each other's path one day ok.

& i'm sorry if i hurt you in any way.

i'll always love you. (:

note : i'm slowly letting things go for now. wish me luck.

but still, i can just blow up anytime, anywhere.

enough said.

faster that the speed of light.

2009-08-28T19:30:00.004+08:00

supressing every single emotion that i'm facing these past few days.

i'm freaking stressed up. my motions are just going haywire.

i really can't take it anymore. but i just don't know how to let it out.

i'm making people around me laugh, smile & giggle to my funny jokes.

but at the end of the day, i don't laugh nor smile nor giggle.

i'm still the sad me that i've known ever since u walk out from my life.

i can be there for others all the time but who's going to be there for me?

i'm busy helping others but i'm just not helping myself.

i don't even know why am i being like this? i have no answers to my own actions lately.

one moment i can laugh, then the other moment i can just break down & cry.

what is freaking wrong with me?!

or maybe i'm suffering from depression.

but when i analyse my actions, i don't even have signs & symptoms of depression.

then what the heck am i suffreing from?!

i don't even know what's wrong with me & i don't even know what i'm doing to my life right now.

oh god, i know all of this are just test given by you.

i really pray that i can survive through all of this.

please help me through this.

i'm really, really supressing all my emotions at this very moment.

& please, don't trigger the alarm. coz i'm going to burst out very soon.

the only advice is : you better hope & pray that it's not you who i'm going to burst out to.

good luck people.

enough said.

s-u-n-d-a-y..

2009-08-23T20:46:00.006+08:00

the newest addiction of mine, popeye's biscuits. (:

today, i'm feeling so fine.

i'm still wondering why am i like this today.

i'm smiling like sun. hahahaha!

maybe it's the atmosphere.

it's fasting month. so it's different.

no satans to disturb my emotions or even poking me with some stupid thoughts.

yeahhh..

honestly, i miss you damn much love.

but i can control the feeling.

& it's super wierd luh...

oh well..

today i didn't had my movie marathon.

but i did manage to watch the movie, " hangover ".

haha. it's a nice movie. made me laugh abit. heh.

" you make me smile like the sun, fall out of bed, sing like bird,
dizzy in my head, spin like a record, crazy on a Sunday night. "

addiction.

2009-08-22T09:55:00.005+08:00

i wonder why i kept on thinking about you.
every single moment of the day, you're always on my mind.

everytime i look at your pictures or even our pictures,
i'll ask myself why. why did all of this happen between us?

or maybe there's just something missing.
even the slightest thing could make something go wrong.

i'm watching " vicky christina barcelona " currently.
a beautiful show. i seem to like it though. (:

" something about you is so addictive. "

fasting month. (:

2009-08-21T23:20:00.000+08:00

" ku terbuai bayangmu. "

besok da start puase sey.
hope i get to complete my fasting month this time without paying back.
hahaha!

ok. today i went home early.
it was raining heavily for a moment.
then it stopped.
planned to go to vivo city to do some shopping.
but since no one want to acompany me, i didn't go.
so i stayed at home and sleep. haha!

tmrw im staying at home and complete my project.
and also to do some revision. (:

hoping to go out tmrw actually.
but see how luh. haha! (:

" ku ingin bersamamu selalu.. "

God, is there some way for me to take his place?

2009-08-19T21:54:00.004+08:00

the only thing that i want is just to meet you tomorrow.
but i guess you're too busy.
i have no choice but to understand your situation.

i guess whatever plan we have on friday is cancelled.
it's ok. i don't blame you for not going.
i'm really ok with it.

u take care ok.
cheer up. don't let failure bring you down.
" tidak semestinya kita gagal sekali, kita akan gagal selamanya. "
don't work hard. work smart ok dear. (:

remember,
i'll always be here for you if you need anything dear.
i love you. (:

" will you think that you`re all alone, when no one`s there to hold your hand? "

sober.

2009-08-16T20:40:00.000+08:00

" three months, i’ve been living here without you now. "

yes. it is three months.
going to be four soon.

and yes, i'm getting sick.
down with a flu and sorethroat.
hope i get well soon.

to you,
please. don't let me on.
if you want to go, just go.

18th birthday.

2009-08-14T23:38:00.000+08:00

happy birthday to you,
happy birthday to you,
happy birthday to riyana..
happy birthday to you. (:

to family & friends who wished me today,
thanks you so much! love you lots. (:

especially to YOU.
& you know who you are ehh...
don't try to step blurr..

eve of 18th birthday!

2009-08-13T21:40:00.003+08:00

& guess what?
tomorrow is my 18th birthday!
yippieee! (:

ok. dah.

currently i'm studying about BCLS.
in another words, it's called CPR.
anyway, i'm having an exam & practical test on it tomorrow.
oh goshh.. wish me luck ok.

back to studying. toodles. (:

love,
thanks for messaging me today.
i thought you've forgotten about me since you've been super busy this past few days.
but it's ok. i understand.

tomorrow's my birthday. hope you remember.
if not, i bite, smack, pinch & kick you on the butt really damn hard.
hahahahhahah!

love you baby boy. (:

terlalu cinta.

2009-08-10T22:11:00.001+08:00

" tuhan, maafkan diri ini yang tak pernah bisa menjauh dari angan tentangnya.
namun, apalah daya ini. bila ternyata sesungguhnya aku terlalu cinta dia. "

thoughts.

2009-08-09T23:51:00.007+08:00

have you ever wonder what your lover is doing at this very moment?
and when you called him numerous of times, he doesn't answer your calls?
and when you texted him, he doesn't reply?

have you ever kept on having this thinking that he's out with a girl?
a girl whom you dislike and you simply can't find the reason why you dislike her?

have you ever had the feeling that he's finding another girl just to replace you?
have you ever wondered that he's just trying his best just to stay away from you?

have you ever wondered what would you do if he had a new girlfriend?
a new girlfriend who is not you?

i kept asking all those questions to myself every single time.
i just don't know what's wrong with me.
maybe i'm still stuck to you.
having that thinking of not letting you go to another lady.

conclusion is, maybe that i'm just paranoid about you.
i can't deny it coz sometimes i do get paranoid about you.
you can tell me not to be paranoid, but i just can't help it.
im really sorry. truly i am.

maybe it's like a sickness which has no cure for it.
or is it just a habit?
i'm not even sure myself.

each day. i'm learning to let go, slowly.
slow and steady wins the race, rite?

thanks for your support all this while, love.
really appreciate it. love you. (:

singapore's 44th birthday!

2009-08-09T21:15:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 44TH BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE!

so that means that singapore's birthday is over.
so next is mine! muhahah! yippie! (:

lets count down..
5 more days to my 18th birthday. (:
like, finallyyyyy...

well, since today is national day.
i've been a good girl, sitting at home like my own business.
i mean, it's national day for god's sake.
confirm all the places in sngapore will be crowded luh.
i super dislike crowded places. urghh!

lets talk about tomorrow.
tomorrow i'm going to the singapore zoological gardens.
yippie! * jumps around *

ok. now i have nothing much to type already.
have fun people. toodles.
* dancing like nobody business *

thanks.

2009-08-08T18:31:00.000+08:00

" jangan terlalu suka, nanti luka. "

loving you is really a blessing.
thanks for everything said & done love. (:

talked to him yesterday.
there were so much things that we talked about.
cried. laughed. giggled. smiled. frowned.

love,
now i understand your situation.
after all those things that we've gone through, i finally understood.
we're just humans. we're not perfect.
you have your own goals & interest. so do i.
just hope that we'll cross each others path again one day. (:

time.

2009-08-06T20:41:00.004+08:00

" sometimes love comes around & it knocks you down. "

i just couldn't figure out what's happening to us lately.
hear so much stories from people about you & me.
its really confusing.

everyone asked me to move on & sadly, those people includes you.
it wasn't that suprising though.
i guess i had that feeling rite inside me after we broke up.

it just saddens me.
everything that's happening to us now is just so sudden.
or should i say, unexpected.

i told myself to move on.
coz i had that feeling that you just can't see us getting back together ever again.
maybe it's because of whatever we've done in the past.
or maybe it's because of whatever i've done towards you.
i'm just not sure about that.

but sadly, i'm unable to move on.
coz i still do love you very much.
very, very, very much.

i'm still here for you.
just waiting for you to tell me everything that i need to know.
i've been wanting to hear all those things out of yor own mouth.

if you really want to leave me and go with another girl,
i'm really fine with it.
coz it's your life. i can't control it.
if being with another girl makes you happy, i'll be happy for you too.

my wish is just for you to tell me everything that i really need to know.
whether or not it hurts me. so be it.
i'm ready to hear it from you.
coz whatever you say determines whether should i stay or should i go.
think about it.

" It’s hard holding you, loving you, losing you. "

sad & confused.

2009-08-04T22:33:00.004+08:00

today is BEG phase test one. (:
well finally, i get to dress up and complete the test.
it was really fun i tell you.
too bad that i'm not able to update all the pictures taken here.

today is 4th.
so i guess you know what day is today.
but sadly, you didn't realise it i guess.
the day before, things became way out of hand.
seriously.

you keep on playing games with my heart.
one moment you're like this and another moment you're like that.
i just don't know what to do with you.

evey single time i want to move on,
you keep on pulling me back.
i'm not balming you my dear,
but sometimes you're actions are too much.
and unpredictable i should say.

i'm confused. help me.

sing me a song about love.

2009-08-02T22:14:00.006+08:00

guess what?
i'm so hardworking today.
i've been printing out past year exam papers.
how cool is that? hahahahahahah!

ok. that's lame.

nothing much happened today.
came back home after a wedding invitation.
while i was on the way home, munched on some butter biscuits.
yummyyyyy.. (:

and here i am.
munching on nothing. how sad.
printing on past year exam papers.
macam aunty yang kat kedai photocopy pulak. hahahah!

oh my. tommorow's first period is behavioural science.
alah. tak gerek uh macam nie.
ahh. nevermind luh.

ok. i think i'm starting my nonsense again.

by the way love,
maybe i'll be meeting you on friday.
see how ok. hope that everything goes smoothly.
well. i have lots & lots of things to say to you.
just pray& hope & make sure that all those things comes out from my mouth.
& make sure u hear it. it not, you're going to get it!

anyways, i'm missing you so much. (:

saturday. (:

2009-08-01T16:50:00.008+08:00

hey there.
it's been a while since i last blogged.

i'm fine by the way.
just busy with school project & studies. (:

there's alot of things that happened during the weekdays.
shall not elaborate further on it.
for me to know only. hahahaha!

i've been missing him this pass few days.
texted. called. chat.
except meeting up.
oh well..

planning to go out today.
not sure where.
just planning to go to the library to do some reseach on my project.
hahha. we'll see how aites. (:

anyway, just want to wish all the nurses

HAPPY NURSES DAY! (:

well. i'm one of them too. yeah me!
thanks for he wishes people. (:

unpredictable.

2009-07-28T21:06:00.005+08:00

well love,
you came back into my life once again.
thanks. (:

for you.

2009-07-25T00:16:00.002+08:00

i hate being left hanging after a break up.

can u please just stop playing games with my heart.

im waiting for you to spill out all the feelings that ure been keeping from me all this while.

i would be delighted to hear them eventhough it hurts so much.

i’m willing to. just to move on with my life.

i hope you understand how i feel.

enough said.